The feeling I get every time I hit “Publish” it’s like a stab in the chest…it hurts more and more everyday.
I personally think I’m good at keeping secrets. Like I said in my “Boyfriend?” post when people tell me their secrets it make me feel good about myself. They see something in me that I don’t see- trust.
I cherish their secrets like they were my own, but I only wish they would do the same in return.
I have quiet a bit of obvious trust issues, not even my closest friends know my “secrets”.
Yes, I do feel bad about keeping them from them each and everyday, which is why blogging hurts. I feel like I can tell the internet my secrets, but I can’t tell the people that I call my friends.
The internet can judge me of course, but they can’t do it to my face, whereas my friends can judge me directly to my face.
And yes again I’ve heard it all before, “If they were your real friends they wouldn’t judge you” or “If they were your real friend they would understand.” I completely understand that, but deep down whether you admit it or not we all judge.
Blogging hurt because my friends think that I trust “strangers” on the internet more than them.
Blogging hurts because everything I say here online I would get made fun of for saying aloud.
Which is why I’m here to- build trust. To some that may sound stupid, but I have set goals for myself and myself only. if I can trust a “stranger” I can trust someone who is part of my everyday life.
If I were to take everything I wrote and read it out loud it would be the end of Taylor, but Taylor is just getting started 😉
Thanks for reading!
I just feel the need to thank all you guys cause I know I just started this whole blogging thing, but you guys don’t know how much you mean to me. I’m honestly so grateful for the internet because without the internet I wouldn’t have gotten to know any of you guys, and I’m so grateful for the people who actually took the time to speak to me and get to know me on my first week here. I felt so welcomed and loved and I can’t wait for the “VINTAGE FAMILY” to grow and people come together, just to listen and hear each other out ❤ So, thank you guys so so so much. It’s so amazing how something like Wi-Fi can brings a world full of people together.
I love you all ❤ ❤